Being estranged from a family member is generally one of the most difficult and complex issues encountered when preparing one’s estate plan. This is particularly true if the estranged person is a child, grandchild, or sibling (if one has no children) as well as a person with whom one previously had a good relationship.

The first and perhaps most important thing that one needs to do is to prepare a Revocable and/or Irrevocable Trust (Trust) or a Last Will and Testament (LWT) that specifically excludes the estranged individual. Dying without a LWT or Trust would be disastrous if the person from whom you are estranged is a “distributee” of yours under the laws of intestate distribution. A distributee is a person who survives the decedent and is entitled to inherit under New York law if the decedent passes “intestate” (i.e., without a LWT or Trust). Under the laws of intestacy, said person receives a percentage or all of the decedent’s estate, depending on whether such individual is a parent, spouse, child, grandchild, or sibling. The percentage the individual receives is dependent upon how many persons in the same class of distributees survive the decedent. For example, if I die without a LWT or Trust, and I have no spouse, children, grandchildren, and/or parent surviving, but I have two (2) surviving siblings, then in that event each sibling would be entitled to fifty (50) percent of my estate irrespective of my personal wishes. They would also each be entitled to apply to be the administrator of my estate. The laws of intestacy control the distribution of my estate, not my personal unwritten wishes.